rating: 1 8 - p l

is it me or just them trying to play it pro but the affection still shows?

he treated her like dirt.

either art of seduction or high libido and got bored screwing the toilet's seat, they ended up screwing each other.

however good his bomb was, i'd never go for this type, who treated women like dirt and only be nice when they need the hole to ride on.

i read people too much sometimes.

and yes, though this posting might sound innocent, i still considered it obscene.

saddest day

today is officially,



the saddest day for a long time.














sedih.

ree. ah. lee. tee.

me: aku nak duit yang banyak. maknanya, bila aku shopping, banyak2 kali pun, sampai sudah aku tak nampak penghujung wallet aku. punyalah banyak duit aku kan?

him: ko ni gile ke ape? ko ingat ko hidup kat disneyland?

jawapan yang tak sempat aku cakap kat dia:

kalo aku dok disneyland, sampai sudah aku takyah risau pasal duit. duit la yang buat hidup aku bahagia, tapi dalam masa yang masa, sakit jiwa.

aku tak mimpi nak jadi jutawan, cukup sekadar tak payah nak fikir camne nak cari lagi banyak duit nak beli h0nda civik, boleh beli banyak kasut cam imelda, beli banyak buku bertahun-tahun pun tak habis bace.

ada banyak lagi, tapi malas nak cerita. nanti orang kate aku ni tak sedar diuntung plak, nak macam2.

nak gi beli kasut jap. oktengksbai.

warzone: part 1

now i know why i hate book fairs.

people were swarming like wiggly maggots over stinking feces. i had to push my way through the non-budging crowd. and i think i might've pronounced my utter dislike towards large, determined crowds. not that i can't handle them, just that if i had any other choice, i'd avoid them at all costs.

it was like going through a war. a bit to the plus side, the place was quite properly ventilated and i felt quite comfy that i'm not sweaty though very uncomfy pushing through the crowds.
i hastily pronounced few days before to someone that i might just be looking around at this book fair, not intending to buy anything. that was all shattered when i was waiting for a friend and i saw a girl carrying a m0y paperbag. then, another one from gempakst4rz. how i wish that it was already pay-day, which wasn't, chist!

gempakst4rz booth was a very small one, i wonder why did they separate their collections, causing the booth to be pronounced a warzone. not even a space to peek at what they were offering. i had to creep at the edges of the crowd to finally get to see. i went very near to the salesgirl and just tell her which ones i wanted that never made it to the display rack. talking of not buying anything eh? i got hold of 6 of their graphic novels. *whee* endless time to drool over the cute shoujo bois. haha!

someone: best ke those comics you bought?

me: i like them. but i don't recommend them for schooling kids.

though the stuffs i bought were shoujo stuffs, i don't think it's suitable for under-18, let alone give them as prezzies for an 8-yo. the theme was mature beyond the years and the language used, any malay language teacher would scream foul for using them in exams.

but sadly, the masses were pupils and all of them carry at least a m0y or gempakst4rz paperbags, which meant, they bought either publishers' stuffs which also meant, they read too-light reads that don't contribute anything except well, thinner wallet.

can't blame them, these reads come cheap. cheaper than any thriller or sci-fi. i got 6 of these, what with the same price and a few bucks more, i can only get a copy of eclips3. how to encourage them to read when all they're interested in are comics and all they're able to afford are these cheap stuffs?

ah well, enough of this masalah negara gibberish. i'm going to another warzone tomorrow, yippeess!!! jom perang!

emo entry

ate seafood steamboat like there's no tomorrow until bloated. ended with marvelicious ice-cream with chocolate topping.

with bloated tummy and felt sick to the bone, sprinted (a.k.a. running high speed) on turf slopes and tar in high heels. just to catch the bus.

result?

the whole being slammed to the wall. then a full fledged truck (the one like opt1mus prim3) rammed against you over and over again. just like j0hnny blaze, except that when he's being gh0st rider he didn't feel pain.

i had that. i felt all that. my worst nightmare. my restless night.
and a fever. the things missing are the throw-ups and diarrhea. adoi.

sometimes, my gobbledygook made me go over the fence.


p/s: when i don't update, i twit or moblog. twitter is the fancy blue apps on the up-to-no-good updates. moblog is the entry which starts with a picture and might have a single sentence or a form-5 composition depending on the idea of the entry. pictures do say a thousand words, but words make them clearer and standardized for everyone.

see? even a postscript is longer than necessary. pardon my pain-in-the-ass sorry self.

Simply stunning!

Tell me where else can i get this breathtaking view?

Gorgeously mahal cam haram sewa stunning.

p/s: gambar tak cantik, amik dr kamera fon buruk.

jualan gudang, lagi.

dalam banyak-banyak sale, sale apa yang paling aku suka?

masa aku shopping dengan aman.

bila aku meroyan melihatkan harga-harga di sekeliling aku.

bila aku tak senang duduk melihatkan banyaknya yang tak diusik.

bila aku merasa sakit jiwa kerana tidak boleh terlebih belanja atau aku harus berpuasa.


bukan sale di s o g o.

bukan jua sale di v i n c c i atau n o s e walaupun aku gila kasut.

bukan juga sale di j u s c o.


tetapi jualan gudang m p h lah yang membuatkan aku jadi orang gila.

aku kan nerd yang berjaya, mestilah ade sindrom kutu buku / ulat buku / bookworm dan segalanya yang berkait lah senang cerita.


p/s: tapi aku tak minat plak gi pesta buku. kenapa ye? sebab pesta buku harga tak gila macam kat jualan gudang. kan kan?

of love affairs, farewells and such...

One:

i'm very much in love. it amused me that i've been for so long. so much that i'm laughing at myself for not realizing it sooner.

of how lovebirds express emselves. if without, i won't even be able to do what i'm doing right now.

i'm just hopelessly head over heels,


in love.


Two:

I haven't properly said my farewell to u. i discover i've never been serious coz i know i'd have u for support. that's why i never stopped fooling around, even now. That's why i couldn't keep u for all that i wanted u to be.

i'm glad we're starting anew. i know u want me to be happy, despite what u call my ridiculous demands, i learnt from the best :P

so, pray for my happiness as i do yours, my goatee santa.


three:

i'm on twilight fever. the vamp heartthrob. AGAIN. coz someone just watched it and been bugging me for spoilers and flooding me with movie lines and fave scenes.

yes, edward is fictitious, but who cares? i adore my books hereos, end of story.


four:

i'm now a hardcore nerd, officially. i sleep with a thesaurus. okthxbye!

kepelikan kejelikan

katakan ini didengar di awal bicara di telefon.

"hai, nama saya rose azureen......"

atau

"ya, sayalah lily ruzanna...."

dengan suara yang diketahui keperempuanannya, sudah terbayang keayuan wajah si pemilik nama, keanggunan dan kesantunan yang bakal terpamer, sesuai dengan makna nama yang baik-baik, seperti bunga. mungkin saja berambut panjang ikal mayang atau sopan bertudung.

lalu salah siapa bila realitinya si empunya nama tidak seperti gambaran yang molek-molek itu tadi?

realiti yang pahit, si empunya diri berambut crew-cut, dan berdada rata! tiada langsung keperibadian perempuan timur, malahan lagak dan gaya hampir kelelakian, mungkin kurang di halkum dan kaki yang licin tanpa cela.

golongan ini merokok dan kebanyakannya dari golongan kurang ketinggian.


tak tahu nak gelak atau rasa simpati.



p/s: first time aku tau nama, gelak guling-guling. hahaha!

lavatory part 1

pintu ditutup.

bunyi pakaian berlaga.

senyap.

tisu ditarik.

senyap.

bunyi pakaian berlaga.

air ditekan.

pintu dibuka.



apa tekaan kalian?


ini realiti di tempat aku yang ramai cha.


jijik.

what it's all about

life is a bucket full of shit.


how you make a dem great filter that separate the stash of gold buried within the pile of feces is how your life is. the better the filter, you hope your life will be full of merriments and less shit. or if the filter's no good, you get shit thrown at you instead.


this is the process i learnt from a wastewater treatment engineer. yes people, she treats the stuffs of the bottom flushed right into the treatment plant. and she found not only excrement, but almost everything that's non-perishable in water, the most valuable, gold with a capital G.

don't ask me what she did with the gold.

aku dah malas plak nak update blog. macam takde point yang best untuk aku highlight. tapi bile dah start macam tak bleh berhenti. hehe.

satu:

smalam pegi pejabat pos yang bukak sampai kul 9 malam. beli setem. ye di zaman emel ni aku masih lagi menggunakan setem untuk projek postcrossing aku. lagi pun kene gune kupon makan free. minggu ni punya, aku tak terfikir nak jual sebab sibuk, malas nak tanye-tanye.

aku duduk kat sudut tepi, tapi memang jelas la nampak. aku tunggu setengah jam untuk diorang datang amik order. aku memang malas gile nak panggil walaupun aku lapar nak mati, sebab aku tengok meja-meja orang yang datang lepas aku, elok je diorang amik order tak payah tunggu panggil. aku rilek lagi main game kat fon padahal hati dah panas semacam je ni, buat eye contact dengan sume staf, sume buat bodo je. padahal aku tak cakap pada mana-mana staf aku tengah tunggu someone ke, menu-book tu memang elok tertutup atas meja aku.

sampai la ade sorang mamat ni baju die lain dari lain, die ade eye-contact dengan aku dan aku angguk.

him: dah order, kak?

me: belum, takde sape pun nak amik order saya (dengan nada yang paling dingin dan hangin. aku wat nada suara camni sampai la aku blah)

him: eh, ala sori kak. ingatkan akak tunggu kawan tadi.

me: saya tak tunggu kawan pun.

him: sori ye. boleh saya amik order skang?

....dan aku pun dengan muke hangin gile terus laju je cakap order aku macam hari-hari aku makan kat situ, hangin nye pasal.

tak sampai 5 minit, order aku sume sampai. mesti order aku potong queue, lame tunggu nye pasal. aku nak tergelak time tu pun ade, gile ekspres.

him: betul tak order akak yang ni?

me: hm, betul.

him: ade pape lagi yang boleh saya bantu?

me: shuh, aku nak makan dah ni takde ape. *ngap*


dan aku rase, semua staf yang ade kat situ sume kene basuh kaw kaw sebab aku tengok elok je pastu sume dok lalu lalang kat area aku padahal sebelum tu takde sape pun heran nak lalu situ. even ade perempuan 2 orang yang datang time aku tengah ngap-ngap tu, sampai 2-3 kali, 2-3 staf yang berlainan datang tanye dah ready nak order belum.

hangin nye pasal, aku makan pun tak kenyang. bile aku makan tak kenyang, lagi la aku hangin. nasib baik la mamat yang amik order aku tu, 2 kali datang, tanye ok tak makanan aku, ade pape tak die leh bantu, sejuk sikit hati, aku nak wat muke ketat dengan die pun tak sampai hati.

mungkin sebab aku dress-up macam college-student, nampak tak stylo dan tak berduit. datang dengan kupon free lak tu kan. hahaha. mamat yang amik order aku la yang menyelamatkan keadaan dari membuat aku mengamuk kat manager diorang. aku penah wat camni ok, dan situasi yang lebih teruk. aku kene terima aku memang ade sejarah hitam dengan tempat ni. dem!


dua:

aku borak-borak dengan sorang mamat ni, campur-campur, kejap cakap melayu, kejap speaking. cerita yang panjang, tapi aku nak highlight satu benda je:

him: nak dengar satu cerita tak? pada zaman dahulu...

me : (aku terus potong cakap dia)... sorry to say this but can you speak in english? i don't understand your malay.

him: (dumbfounded) er.. kenapa?

me : your malay sounds weird to me.

him: (nak cover segan) oh, ok. once upon a time......


bm dia takde la teruk sangat, aku paham je, tapi sebab aku sangat suka dengar accent pelik time die speaking. saje wat reason tak masuk akal. kesimpulannya, aku perempuan gile yang memang suka dengar orang yang pandai speaking. sekian.


tiga:

kepada budak yang aku sms pasal kerispykreme smalam, anggapla itu aku nye wish ek? nanti aku belanja ko kerispykreme ye sebagai hadiah bila kite pegi sane nanti. kwangkwang. :D


empat:

makan something smalam yang ingatkan aku pada karl. karl yang dah tak tau ape cerita. karl yang jauh.

uuuuu... rindu kat karl. :(


sekian adanya penceritaan tahpape untuk kali ini.

kemahuan

her: yang, i nak seribu.

him: nak buat ape?

her: i nak beli phone baru. phone i kan dah rosak.

him: apa mimpi ni? selalu you tak nak i belikan barang untuk you. mahal la , membazir la, ape la.

her: lagi pun i banyak belanja la bulan ni, betulkan kete eksiden, itu la ini la.

him: hm, ok.


....dan si awek pun dapat la phone baru, yang dihadiahkan oleh si boyfriend , bukan pakai plastik, tapi cash ok?



uuuuu, aku pun nak bf husband camni. bf takbleh, nanti kalo clash kene pulang balik, jadi isu dan tuntutan. hahaha!!

pemberitahuan : notification

aku dah start busy. nampak sangatla selama ni aku tak busy. entri sebelum ni ade gambar, maknanye aku wat moblog time kat umah.

so, aku mungkin tak dapat nak reply ym. tapi apa yang aku leh janji, aku akan bace sume msg ym. cume tak dapat prompt reply cam dulu. aku tak reti invisible. orang yang takde keyakinan diri je wat camtu. hahaha.

entri kat blog ni pun, aku cube usahakan. sebab dah kurang mende menarik berlaku dalam hidup aku yang boring ni.

weekend yang lepas, antara bende paling menarik dalam tahun ni. bak kate adik aku pun,

"hidup aku lebih bermakna bila ko dah keje."

ye, memang aku dah keje, tapi keje aku bukan cop duit, oke?

even kalo keje aku cop duit, aku lagi suke pegi bakar duit. sekali cop terus gi bakar. baru le keje aku bermakna. kan? kan? haha.

aku sangat suka bila aku busy. takde la rase bersalah sangat kalo gi bakar duit lepas busy cop duit kan? hahaha.

Tak faham

Ini gambar bege m0zza. Fastf0od ni dah tuka k0tak jadi camni - wrapper yang ada burger holder. Sepatutnye k0yak tepi dan makan sambil pegang holder. Tapi ramai jugak yg tarik holder dan koyak cam ape je dan pegang bege tanpa halangan. So, idea asal yang bernas terus jadi cam tak berguna.

Aku tengah suka gabungkan perkara yang takde kaitan dalam satu entri. Harap maap kalo ade yang pening.

Sorang kawan aku ni, ada bf. Tak hensem, tak berduit, takde manners, tapi dah kapel bertaun2. Bukan kawan aku tu tak cantik, cume aku fikir dia berhak dapat yang lebih baik. Bahagian masing2. Tak kaco aku sudah.

Aku mahu lelaki yang sedap mata aku pandang, paham english aku dan aku paham english die, bleh jadi imam dan tau bace tahlil, kaye, berjawatan tinggi dan hensem gile beautiful hands and beady eyes.

Aku tak mintak banyak pun. Yang paling penting, die tak tinggal solat. Macam dah jumpe, tapi boleh tak aku cakap,

"mahukah kamu menikahi daku?"

Mesti die kate aku gile.
Hehe.
Biarla, aku suka bila aku menyukai.

Lupa kejap pada perasaan tak tahu.

Post-mix

This is what we call a metr0sexual man.

On an0ther unrelated matter:

Ya Allah, sungguh aku hamba yang lemah.

Aku kalah dengan perasaan ini.

Perasaan yang bisa menghancurkan tamadun, menghilangkan relevan insan.

Ya Tuhan yang Maha Menguasai langit dan bumi, kurniakan aku kerelaan Sarah, ketabahan Hajar.

Tetaplah wahai hati. Kuatlah wahai diri.
Ini sekecil kuman. Gigih Usaha, rezeki ditangan Dia Yang Satu.

Ampuni aku Ya Rabb.