of boyfriends and girls?

my friend and i talked about physical appearance and personality that day. this so professional topic came up upon the question of his : why was this girl still single?

the probabilities were:

- that i didn't look hard enough
> err, hello? i'm not the kind of girl who looked for her guy like shopping for clothes.

- that i was too picky
> why would i settle down for the second best available? let go, i want to see the world. but in the end, still wanting the not-logically-existed perfect package?

- give up the shy girl type. it's time for the flirtatious hottie chick.
> definitely... not.

- that i am not girlish enough?
> ok, so i don't wear and loved pink that much. and i'm not into trends, or eyeshadows or lipsticks and i don't wear heels *eeek*. and i consantly not associated with all of those. but i'm still a girl. i have it stamped on my forehead.

my mother has been nagging about my half-half attitude. what halves? her exact words were, "nak kata perempuan, tak duduk rumah, tak suka buat kerja rumah, kerja melasak keluar sana sini tapi nak kata lelaki, dah sah-sah perempuan". i'm very much aware of that, mom. and i'm proud i'm a girl. very thankful for it.

the fact is, i'm a girl that guys like to be friends with, not the one they'd have to be their girlfriend. so, i'll just live my life for now, enjoying the freedom to go out with anyone, having crushes on guys without feeling guilty and be me.

maybe, i should go to grooming classes?